Doubting myself

My B-day Party. Who knew a month later I would get my last relaxer?

For some reason last week I was having a hard time sticking to my decision to big chop this Thursday. It has been a week or so since I took my kinky twist out and I was back to my roller set routine. This time things were so much easier for me. I'm not sure if it was due to renewed patience or the new purchased headbands. I was able to finally rock my roller set for more then 3 days. I actually wore it for 6 days which is close to my normal wash day. My excitement over been able to manage my hair could of cause me to start doubting myself and my decision.
For the entire week, I sat and debate about whether or not I would still big chop at the end of June. I thought about how short my hair would be and then the reaction of my coworkers. I work in a very conservative office and I am so sensitive to the stares and comments. Putting off my BC until August seemed do-able again (It was my original BC day - 6 months transitioning). I started thinking, "why rush it?" After I washed my hair on Thursday, I decided to flat iron my hair for the last time before I was completely natural. It was me saying goodbye to my hair. Then I started to think, "hey if I can flat iron it like this then when I go to the beach, I can still manage my hair - no need to cut it."

I guess I need to rewind a bit. This weekend I'm going to MIA (South Beach). Definitely would like to go swimming while I'm there. But I could not imagine how I would care for my hair once it was wet. Can't really tote a hairdryer on an airplane. So I thought that BCing would be the best choice. And it still is because my natural hair was curly again once I went outside in the humidity.

All this to say, that my thoughts on what other people would think and what other people were telling me were getting in the way of what I wanted to do. Never should you let what people think stop you from doing something positive for you. So 3 more days of transitioning and by the end of the week I'll be natural. Yeah Babay!

Renewed faith in Glamour.com?

I am so super excited right now. For the longest I’ve had a subscription to Glamour Magazine. My friends would make fun of me for quoting their beauty, hair or love tips which I did as soon as I finished each month’s issue.  After being a little disappointed in them yesterday, today they renew my faith in them.

                                               I definitely feel his excitement. And he's just so adorable.


They are featuring a new blogger in their beauty department - Andrea Arterbery.Andrea is not only the first African American blogger I’ve seen on Glamour.com but she’s also natural! In one of her first articles, she talks about protecting her hair against heat – blow drying and flat ironing. I’m not sure if she wears her hair straight most of the time or curly (I'm leaning towards straight since she says she'll do anything to keep it straight) but none the less, I’m excited to see a woman on the blog that will address more things that will pertain to African American woman and hopefully natural woman. Make sure to check her out on Glamour.com and she has her own blog at The Glamazons.

Where are "the trashy black girls"?

The blogosphere has been splattered with talk about American Apparel's Dress Code. The conversation even reached Glamour.com, which has three blogs I’ve been subscribing to for the past year and a half. Slaves to Fashion, Girls in the Beauty Department and Vitamin G, gives tips for fashion, beauty and health along with all the latest news in their perspective areas. I was disappointed however to see what Glamour choose to focus on in their article on American Apparel. Instead of discussing the “trashy black girls” statement, they were appalled at the fact that employees couldn’t wear bangs. Like really? Bangs? I honestly didn’t need them to do a feature dedicated to the “trashy black girls” statement but could’ve at least mentioned it. While I shouldn’t be upset that a predominately white magazine would understand the significance American Apparel’s dress code had on the black community, I feel they could have at least touched on the subject. As one of their faithful readers, I felt excluded and overlooked. It a blatantly  racist driven statement which to me goes beyond the dress code. It hits the customers too. 

Twist out corporate style and my sister

Here are some pictures of a hairstyle I did for work the other day. I put the top half of my hair in a ponytail. Then the bottom I pinned up in a french roll. It was really simple and easy to do. And the other picture is my adorable sister. She's been natural all her life and usually wears her hair straight. I encouraged her to wear her hair curly and I absolutely love it (I think she does too).

Twist Out and Shout

I decided to do a twist out on my kinky twist. They were starting to get fuzzy and my relaxed hair was making a break from the twist. Here is the finished result . . .
I will post more pictures later! 

Loving this new growth

I really love having my hair in kinky twist because I am able to monitor my growth easily.So far my hair has grown almost 3/4 inches in a month. WOW! I knew my hair grew fast but geez. I'm excited though. I don't really dwell on growth but the faster my hair grows the more styling options I'll have.

Oh and I've been trying to find ways to hide the new growth. I found this wonderful headband that had tons of people confused as to what I did to my hair. It's just a headband folks!

This is another style that I did. I loved it but weave on my skin (and apparently forehead) makes me itch.

Loving this journey!

Big Chop Fever and the new 50 day challenge

I've spent the last few days . . . ok who am I kidding I've spent the last few months, watching videos and looking at woman enjoying their BC. I have caught the fever. Right now I'm only 3 months into my transition and 20-something-days into my 100 day challenge. The idea of being completely natural is so exciting that I'm ready to make the leap. I'm trying to remain patient . . . . at least until the end of the month.

So I'm going to Miami at the end of the month and I am the most ocean loving woman that Georgia could birth. I started to contemplate how I would enjoy the ocean and the pool without ruining my kinky twist which are already in a state of disrepair. I got frustrated and decided not to get my hair wet. Not to swim and truly enjoy my vacation. How boring is that? So I decided to just bring an end to my 100 day challenge. Instead of fighting my desire, I'll give in this time.

Next week I'm going to do a twist out on my kinky twist. On June 24th, I plan on finishing my transitioning journey and BC. Stay tuned.

Permission to be nappy

I shouldn't have to ask for your approval
I shouldn't have to ask for you to understand
I shouldn't have to ask for you to appreciate who I am

Why do you think there's only one measure of beauty?
Why do you think to that I have to conform?
Why do I have to fight to be the way I was born?

I don't need the negative comments
Nor the nasty stares
I don't need your permission to be happy
because for your opinion - I just don't care

Nappy is what I was
Nappy is what I am
Nappy is what I'll be

I don't need your permission to be nappy
I don't need your permission to be me

Embracing my curls

When I first begin to ponder becoming natural, I did not intend to wear my hair in its natural state. Growing up my hair was always thick and long. My memories of my hair were spending countless hours detangling and styling my massive locs. Back in the 90’s there weren’t many people around that knew how to care for natural hair. I remember the look of stylists upon first meeting them. The look of shock and the gasp that they would have on their face – the look of disgust that they would have to style this huge fro on this little black girl.

But for some reason that didn’t bother me. I enjoyed my hair even at a young age. I loved my hair. I just didn’t like the combing – I use to be very tender headed but quickly got over that with the mis-styling from my numerous hair braiders. My hair is very coily, like my mother’s, and some people thought that starting at the root to comb it was the best way to tackle it. I would go home with a beautiful style but a sore head. My mother seemed to be the only one that knew how to care for my hair – because it was her hair on my head. She had her own bouts with her natural hair. She has relaxed two times only to come back to her coily hair.

Looking back I realized I only relaxed because I didn’t know how to enjoy my hair once I was older. So for those that say it’s self hate – IT’S NOT SELF HATE!! High school was upon me and I wanted a more grown-up style. I tried wearing bangs because I had a phobia over my forehead and the humidity would send them running right back up to my scalp. So I relaxed to end my war with humidity.

So now, I’m here. I’ve had my fun with my relaxer and I’ve had my fights with my relaxer. After experiencing so much breakage and dry hair, I decided to go back to plan A. My natural hair never did me wrong and it was much healthier than my current situation. Plus all my thick hair was gone. So I planned on flat iron my hair – a ton of my friends currently do this now. Will I wear my hair straight once I’m natural – occasionally yes. But since entering the natural world, and learning about all the styles and products. I only wish that in 2000 I had the knowledge I have now then. I am glad to say I’m embracing my curls. I’m embracing me, and my heritage – past, present, and future.

Modeling world is not color blind

Essence recently featured a short documentary on their blog following a young black model struggling to become apart of Fashion Week. I think it's an interesting story that shows the under appreciation of black beauty in the fashion world.